I haven't updated in awhile. This will probably be my last post (at least for a long time). I wish I could say all was going well, but my life has collapsed. I create the appearance that its all together, it is not.
Very recently I was elected to an even more esteemed position. Our organization works under another organization that I am begining to loathe for their complacency and inaction. People are dying. I am rendered ineffective as one voice rowing against the tide.
School is.... I don't like my major. Three years into it and its not what I want to do and I am absolutely sure. What do I switch to at this point? Do I just finish the job? I feel as if I am having some kind of mid-mid-life crisis.
There is this girl I adore more than anything. I've liked her since the summer. She turned me down a couple months ago, but the interest never dwindled and some days I'm still 100% certain shes interested back. But recently I had to listen to her tell me about her new boyfriend. So demoralizing. He doesn't even make her happy. I could make her happy. I feel so alone.
I watch more and more as the world breaks into shambles and debris. All the while, my own life decomposes and fizzles out.
Sorry my friends, but I have failed. My life lacks meaning once again.
I have fallen.
Chatboard (0)